Jamie-Lynn Sigler thought ‘people are only attracted to you when you’re perfect’

Jamie-Lynn Sigler, aka Meadow Soprano, is now 42 years old and has two sons with her husband Cutter Dykstra, Beau, 10, and Jack, five. After originally presenting symptoms in 2000, Sigler was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS) in 2001, when she was just 20 years old. Jamie-Lynn first revealed her diagnosis in 2016, sharing that she’d been careful to hide her condition from her coworkers for 15 years. In fact, Jamie-Lynn was so nervous about making her MS public that she was too scared to look at her phone after the news dropped. Those fears were quickly alleviated when the reaction was one of overwhelming support. That was a watershed moment for Jamie-Lynn that led to self-acceptance and unlocked her superpower: vulnerability.

On the morning of Jan. 20, 2016, Jamie-Lynn Sigler was a nervous wreck. She had just married her fiancé of almost three years, baseball player Cutter Dykstra, and was awaiting the new issue of PEOPLE, in which they had shared exclusive photos and details of their big day.

But she was also revealing an even bigger secret. For almost 15 years the Sopranos alum had been quietly dealing with the debilitating symptoms of multiple sclerosis (MS), a degenerative autoimmune disease that damages the central nervous system.

When the issue hit newsstands, Sigler was afraid to look at her phone but quickly discovered an overwhelming outpouring of positive support.

“It was a big moment for me, because it was the beginning of this journey of self-reflection and self-acceptance,” she says. “I grew up with this idea that people are only going to be attracted to you when you’re perfect, and it’s quite the opposite. MS gave me my superpower, which is vulnerability, because the more raw and real and open I am — and this has forced me to be that — the more beautiful connections are.”

While she has trouble walking for long periods of time and cannot run, “I can still accomplish the things that I want to do, whether it be at work or at home,” she says.

[From People]

That is such a wonderful attitude, and sign of maturity. I know this doesn’t apply to everyone, but I think when we’re younger, we tend to have this naïve worldview about standards, expectations, and what constitutes “perfection.” We put a lot of pressure on ourselves as a result. When we’re kids, we care about pleasing our parents. As we get older and into our teenage years, we want our friends to like us. As young adults, we might stop caring so much about what others think about us, but we still may privately compare ourselves to our peers in terms of looks, career, relationships, fashion, etc.

When my older son was born, I suddenly felt like I had to stifle parts of my personality because I was a loud-mouthed NY native who was still fairly new to living in the South. I didn’t want to embarrass him or have other moms think I was weird. It took me years to work out that honestly, we’re all a little bit weird in our own ways, lol. I’m happier just being myself and there’s no set rules on what people are or aren’t attracted to. There really is something to be said about that moment when you accept yourself for all of your strengths, flaws, and vulnerabilities. It’s very empowering. I’m really glad that Jamie-Lynn is in a good place now and wish her all of the best in the years to come.

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Photos via Instagram and credit: Xavier Collin / Image Press Agency / Avalon

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