DEAR DEIDRE: AT the moment I feel like my world is caving in.
My dad is a control freak and Mum is an alcoholic.
I’m an autistic guy aged 24, and I’d love to be able to leave home for a happier life but I can’t imagine being ever capable of taking that step.
My brother is 19 and hangs out with a really bad group of friends – they are heavily into drugs.
Mum is 44 and Dad is 47.
They have their ups and downs. The worst time was a few years ago when Dad hit her.
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Their relationship seems better now but Mum drinks at home most nights and has at least two bottles of wine.
At the weekends, she goes out to the pub with friends and if she gets out of control, we have to go and pick her up.
I’m always on edge because Dad often starts picking fights with anyone who makes comments about her.
He shouts at me a lot too. It’s truly awful.
I can’t cope at the moment.
Life is rushing around me and I don’t know how to deal with everything.
I want to be a kid again.
DEIDRE SAYS: I’m so sorry.
This would be a difficult family situation for anyone, whether neurotypical or diverse.
Your mother’s drinking may be her way of escaping what is going on for her.
Likewise, your father enjoys that feeling of control and can shout at you or others when the situation with your mother and brother may seem hopeless.
Contact Adfam (adfam.org.uk) which supports family members with addicts of any kind.
Get out with your own friends to give you a different focus. You can also find help through Ambitious About Autism (020 8815 5444, ambitiousaboutautism.org.uk), who may be able to give you some coping strategies.
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