ASHLEY Cain has opened up about the agony of planning baby daughter Azaylia's funeral, saying: "It has brought me to my knees".
The 30-year-old star and his girlfriend Safiyya tragically lost their eight-month-old little girl last month after a brave battle with leukaemia.
They have been open in sharing their grief on social media, with both making emotional posts late this evening.
Ashley took to his Instagram Story to reveal that they had started to make funeral plans for Azaylia, but some days it "breaks him" and he's unable to proceed.
The heartbroken dad wrote: "I always dreaded the first time I'd have to plan a funeral. But I never, ever thought it would be my child's funeral.
"Nothing could ever have prepared me for this. Some days it breaks me and I can't even bare to do it.
"I always thought I was tough, but making decisions on how I'm going to bury my baby is enough to bring me to my knees every single time."
He added: "It's hard to make sense of anything right now, especially why did it have to happen this way!"
Safiyya also took to her Instagram Story this evening, saying that she was trying to be as brave as little Azaylia was as she battled the unbearable pain.
Sharing a photo of herself in her pyjamas, the devoted mum penned: "Wearing my rainbow pyjamas for you Azaylia.
"My days are so empty without you, whenever I think of you I ache from head to toe as I miss you so much.
"I get the biggest lump in my throat and I just want to fall to my knees and cry.
"But then I think what would Azaylia do? She would be brave, so I hear in my head: 'Mummy, stay strong, be brave just like me'."
She later added: "I look up to the sky every day, I realise the beauty in the sky like never before. I see the beautiful things you draw and create for me."
Ashley previously admitted that he "finds peace" in the sky after he and Safiyya spotted their daughter's face, angels, and even Azaylia's initial in the clouds after her death.
Safiyya went on: "You are my hero, my guardian angel, I will cope even if it's painful without you because I feel your energy and I know you.
"You're watching and would want me to be strong and brave just like you. You're looking from heaven and I will make you proud.
"I will keep your name spoken forver: Azaylia Diamond Cain. Love, mummy. Forever in my mind, heart, thoughts, and soul."
Earlier tonight, Safiyya was overwhelmed to learn that Azaylia had been honoured by Pride of Britain, which pays tribute to Brits who have "acted bravely or extraordinarily in challenging situations".
At the beginning of April, the parents revealed that doctors had told them they could no longer treat Azaylia's leukaemia, which she was diagnosed with at just eight weeks old.
The family had just raised over £1million for her to get specialist treatment in Singapore when they were delivered the heartbreaking news, with medics finding tumours throughout her body – including on her brain.
In the weeks that followed, Azaylia needed several blood transfusions as she started to cry blood, and suffer nosebleeds – with purple bruises also appearing on her body as her illness meant that her blood could not clot.
She stopped breathing several times and began to suffer seizures in her final days, with Safiyya and Ashley providing their daughter round-the-clock care alongside their close family members.
Azaylia passed away at home on 24 April, with Ashley and Safiyya both paying emotional tribute as they broke the news on social media the following day.
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